This is a shortened version of the original quiz.
DISABLED QUIZ
This Quiz should
never have had to be written.
The only reason it
has been written is to highlight the neglect, stupidity and uncaring attitude
which exists in The Care Industry. There are so many different aspects of
‘Care’ that I have arranged this quiz in sections. I have not included as many
sections as I would have wished because if I had, you poor reader would
probably have given up the will to live by part 27 !!
Humorous though it
may initially appear, it should be considered that a great many of the optional
answers in the Part 1 Multiple Choice as well as indeed their related
questions are in fact based on real events which I or my friends have had to
deal with causing us distress, upset and mental anguish.
The really scary bit
is that I have endured everything marked *
The reason I have decided
to include the humorous content is hopefully to highlight the sheer stupidity
of some of the decisions and practices by people in authority who should know
better!
I suppose that by
highlighting these things I am hoping that steps will be taken to improve
matters.
In this respect
though, I am not holding my breath...!!
PART (1)
Question 1)
I have lost my DLA and no longer have sufficient funds to
heat my house, Do I ...
A) Pack my clothes and coat with newspaper to stay warm like
the government has advised?
B) Drill a hole in the party wall and steal my neighbour’s
electricity?
C) Not really a problem as I will have already starved to
death by September?
Question 2)
*I am in ‘Respite Care’ for two weeks. There is a metal
hoist blocking my way to the toilet, Do I...
A) Press the Fire Alarm?
B) Turn around and break my speed record while finding
another toilet?
*C) Just sit there and let nature take over?
Question3)
*Staying at a Residential Care Facility there is no reliable
Wi-Fi signal. Should I...
*A) Complain about
the dire state of their knackered computer system?
B) Realise that the
disabled should not be able to contact the outside world?
C) Rejoice in the
knowledge that I still have a pen and paper?
Question 4)
*When your disabled transport fails to turn up after waiting
over 3 hours. Do you...
A) Start making your own way along the hard shoulder of the
motorway?
B) Get a tow?
C) Don’t go out?
*D)Get driven home in
a disability vehicle by the Residential Care Home staff where I had been
staying after the booked disability transport failed to turn up despite several
phone calls during which we were told, “The transport is on its way!”. I later found out this transport never did
arrive!!
Question 5)
*You have been
disabled for a while and unable to walk at all. Your cognitive ability is
unimpaired and you are looking for a new challenge or something new to learn.
Do you...
A) Study the ‘Beginner’s Guide to Easy Crosswords’?
*B) Study Walschaerts Valve Gear System for Steam Locomotive
Engineering?
C) Study Physchology?
D)Study counselling in order to help other disabled people?
E) Give up learning anything new because you are disabled?
F) Find something creative to do like Art, Writing etc.
Question
6)
*You are
disabled. The Government is cutting back its welfare expenditure. Do you...
A)Become a
militant protester and chain yourself to the railings outside Parliament?
B)Bombard
your MP with letters of concern about your reduced benefit?
C)Write to
newspapers and give interviews about
your circumstances?
D)Complain
that this is all the Bankers’ fault?
E)Accept
that there is nothing you can do about?
*F)Write a
Blog and/poetry and gradually gain support?
Question 7)
*You received appalling care in a Residential Care
Establishment. Do you...
A)Do nothing because you are disabled?
B)Shout and create a fuss while still at the Care
Establishment?
*C)Make notes and log details in order to complain to a
higher authority?
D)Accept that this appalling care is only to be expected and
you are lucky to be there at all?
Question 8)
Respite Care is provided to give carers a break from caring
for a spouse.
*The Respite care establishment should provide (for the
disabled person)...
A)Accommodation and basic care for every disabled person?
B)A good standard of accommodation and care for every
disabled person?
*C)A good standard of accommodation and care for disabled
people of similar ability? (see note)
*D)An inspiring establishment which promotes activities,
learning and positivity?
*E)Access to reliable computer and/or Wi-Fi capability?
C) note. I
see little point in putting clients of mixed ability into the same Residential
Care Home.
This is because they will not be able to
communicate with each other and if the facilities are geared towards the clients who have learning
issues it will be detrimental to those who do not.
Question 9)
*You get free Patient Transport provided to take you to
Hospital Physiotherapy. Are you...
*A)Grateful for the provided transport?
*B)Angry because it arrives two hours late for your
Physiotherapy appointment?
*C)Angry and Depressed when it doesn’t pick you up to take
you home again?
*D) ‘Held Hostage’ when they get you into it but can’t open
the door to let you out?
Question 10)
*A 60 year old disabled man who is confined to a wheelchair
is in pain, shakes and cannot talk properly and needs assistance to do
everything is deemed ‘fit for work’ by ATOS. He goes to the Job Centre and
tells them he has been sent by ATOS. He
is told...
*A) “YOU ARE KIDDING ME!! GO HOME!!”
B) “We have a vacancy
for a window cleaner.”
C) “I’ve had enough! You can have my job if you like!”
D) “How do you fancy being a scaffolder?”
Question11)
*After being declared fit for work by ATOS and having their
benefits stopped Disabled people have...
A)Become Olympic Gymnasts?
*B) Self-harmed?
*C) Committed suicide?
*D)Suffered severe depression and anxiety or made their
mental illness profoundly worse?
*E)Died of the illness/disability which according to ATOS
they never had in the first place?
Question 12)
A good part-time job for an ATOS medical assessor would
be...
A)A Stand-Up comedian?
B)An undertaker?
C)A politician?
D)A Tailor (stitching up) ?
Question 13)
It has been suggested (by myself) that Bankers’ Bonuses should
be awarded with the same diligence and effort as ATOS judgements. This would
mean that bankers would have to demonstrate and prove that...
A)They can park their 4x4 in a disabled bay?
B)They can list their off-shore bank accounts in
alphabetical order?
C)They can provide evidence of having visited the Cayman
Islands?
D)They are penniless, distressed, self-harming and on the
verge of suicide?
Question 14)
As well as the Disabled, other groups in the UK to be
persecuted by the Government in this time of Financial Restraint and Cutbacks
include...
A)The Bankers?
B)The Politicians?
C) “Wait... I’m still thinking... Eh!... There have to be
others. Surely... Eh!... ?
D)The Job Centre staff harassed by hundreds of complaining
and distressed disabled people?
Question 15)
ATOS Appeals. If you
don’t agree with the ATOS Medical Assessment decision you can...
A)Appeal to the brain surgeon who happens to be moonlighting
there as a plumber at the same time?
B)Appeal to the ECHR on the grounds of disability discrimination?
(I wouldn’t bother – you probably won’t live long enough!!)
C)Appeal on the grounds that you have contracted some deadly
infectious disease ( the name of which you cannot pronounce) from your last visit to the infested swamps
of Borneo?
D)Appeal on the grounds of ‘Diminished Responsibility’
because you were mad enough to go to their assessment in the first place?
Question 16)
At the ATOS assessment you are asked if you want to say a
few words ...
A)In your defence?
B)To your phsychiatrist?
C)To the ‘Sun’
newspaper?
D)To the ‘Citizens’ Alliance for North Korean Human Rights’?
Question 17)
At the ATOS assessment you are asked what kind of job may
suit you. You reply...
A) “Are you having a laugh? You self-centred, insensitive,
disability-phobic brainless half-wit!!”
B) “I am claiming political asylum” in your best Bulgarian
voice
C) “A North Sea Oil Platform Engineer”?
D) “An Astronaut”?
Actual TRUE QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS given in real
situations in PART (1) marked with *
PART (2) For People who have thoughts
about Disability on a daily basis.
Please answer A,B,C or D and check your rating at the end of
PART (2).
Question 1
You want to go on a bus journey. Do you say...
A) I cannot get on a bus?
B)Why would I want to travel by bus?
C)They Should design busses to suit me?
D)What is a bus?
Question 2)
You have a hospital appointment to go to. Do you say...
A) Great! I really need my physiotherapy session?
B) I don’t think I’ll bother going. I’m healthy enough?
C)They can’t offer me anything I can’t do on my own?
D)I hope it is a Private Hospital. I don’t want to mix with
ordinary people?
Question 3)
You have to stay in ‘Respite Care’ establishment for a week.
Do you say...
A) “I know it’s not good, but I don’t have a choice?”
B) “Over my dead body!!”?
C) “Great! I’ll enjoy the computer room and the Sauna?”
D) “I expect it has a sea view and 24 hour room service?”
Question 4)
You see a disabled person in a wheelchair stuck in a large
crack in the pavement. Do you...
A)Stay with them and ask a passerby for assistance?
B)Walk past and grin smugly?
C)You carry on going?
D)You carry on going thinking, “Why should I help? It’s
their problem – not mine!”?
Question 5
The UK Government are
reducing disabled benefits but also reducing tax payable by the rich, and
giving an increased amount of money away in Foreign Aid to dubious Regimes. Do
you say...
A) “Exactly what I thought they would do! They don’t care
about us!”?
B) “And why shouldn’t they – the disabled don’t need it!”?
C) “I Don’t understand what all the fuss is about!”?
D) “I wish those disabled layabouts would stop
complaining!!”?
Question 6)
Disabled people are genuinely worried about how they will
survive. Do you say...
A) “I don’t know how I will survive!”?
B) “They just want to be dramatic!”?
C) “The Government will look after me. I’m genuinely
disabled!!”?
D) “Will these disabled layabouts ever stop complaining?” ?
Question7)
ATOS have claimed another disabled person is fit for work.
Do you...
A) Worry how you will drive the crane when you can’t climb
stairs?
B) Say, “All he has to do is sit on his arse!!”?
C) Say, “That ATOS chappie was a really nice bloke.”?
D)Say, “Bet they won’t have to work as hard us! Pass the
Champagne, Reginald old chap!!”
Question 8)
In the General Election you think about voting Conservative.
Do you want to speak to...
A) A Psychiatrist – Urgently!! ?
B) Your local M.P. to check the small print of their
Manifesto?
C)Your friends in the pub?
D) Your Wine Merchant’s Champagne Ordering Department ?
PART (2) ~ ANSWERS
Mostly
A’s )
Of
course you’re disabled but you already knew that didn’t you?
Mostly
B’s )
You’re not disabled yet but you have a one
in six chance of experiencing severe disability during the course of your
lifetime. (More than half of disabled people are pensioners who have lived
perfectly healthy lives until their later years). Ditch that smug attitude now
and consider how you would want to be treated in that person’s place.
Mostly C’s)
You are disabled but the penny hasn’t
dropped yet! Discriminatory practice and a NIMBY attitude have seriously
affected your cognitive functions and they are now so deeply ingrained that you
don’t even realise the extent of the damage to your mental health. Seek
professional help now before it is too late!
Mostly D’s)
You
are beyond hope. Maybe a legal injunction will make you behave even if common
decency is beyond your understanding. That’s probably why you work for the
DWP/ATOS/ House of Commons and wouldn’t dream of changing your Tory vote or
deep cleaning that dirty, pus infected swamp that passes for a mind.
PART (3)
THE BIG QUESTION
Can you tell the
difference between A) and B) ?
A)Helpless
individuals who are disabled either mentally, physically or both. People who
have given all they have to give and are tired and emotionally drained from
constant worry about how they will survive when their benefits are cut. People
who have endured and still enduring physical pain caused by accidents or
neurological illnesses. People who are struggling with the realisation that no
matter what they do, their life is not going to get any better. All they can
see is a long tortuous road towards old age and finally death. People who not
complain to others about their hardship.
B)Able and fit
benefit cheats who are so pathetic that they want to deprive those who are
entitled to help. People with absolutely no morals who think the UK Government
owes them something!!
Strangely the UK Government cannot tell the difference so
they persecute the disabled!!
Copyright © Ian m
Allan & Lynn Myland 2013